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I’m bracing myself for the inevitable backlash I’m about to receive!! Okay, here goes: I think kids today are chronically over-scheduled and it’s bad for families. There I said it. Please hear me out before you yell at me, Internet friends.

First of all, I was a year-round three sport athlete growing up. I talked about this in my most popular post The Cost of Travel Sports. I played on travel teams and was a busy kid! Still, growing up in the late 90s and early 2000s, I had a lot of free time! I rode my bike all over. I made up games in the backyard with my little sister. I was even bored from time to time! *gasp*

Somehow today’s kids are even busier. Many sports and extracurriculars no longer have an off-season. If you’re an artsy kid, it’s no different. In fact, many sports kids are also pressured to be artsy kids! Parents in 2025 are driving to soccer practice, then piano lessons, then this club and that tutor. It never ends. The pressure on parents to never let their kids “do nothing” is real. I already feel it with a two year old and baby.

Extracurriculars are meant to be enriching and fun. As Americans do, we’ve made them ultra-competitive and mandatory if you want to “succeed” in **waves hands around** this world.

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This culture of scheduling kids activities 24/7 is putting tremendous strain on family finances and robbing them of quality time together.

There are the expected expenses of kid extracurriculars - registration fees, uniforms, equipment, lessons, etc. But there are a shocking amount of indirect costs as well. Gas to get you to and from, dinners out because you aren’t home to cook, hotels if you’re traveling to competitions. It’s amazing to me how a few activities per child can compound costs exponentially. The average family spends close to $800 per kid per year on extracurriculars (and this was from a 2023 study with only 2,000 participants). I think, depending on where you live, that number could be far greater.

Again, don’t get me wrong, extracurriculars are wonderful. My own kids will participate, as did I. I’m not against extracurriculars, I’m against TOO MANY extracurriculars. Big difference.

When your kid is constantly busy with structured activities it’s detrimental in a few ways. The financial, time, and mental health costs are all very real. As someone who has been a parent for two and a half years (obviously I know everything now), I have a few simple suggestions. Take ‘em or leave ‘em.

It’s okay to do less. First, occasional boredom is actually really good for children’s brain development. It fosters creativity and independence. They need to know how to be bored. Secondly, families need downtime together. Simply sitting together at the dinner table, watching a movie, or playing board games (I’m really dating myself here aren’t I?) are excellent ways to create some core memories and bond with the ones you love most. Conversations are how you get to know your kid, and when you’re constantly hustling from here to there, a lot of that gets lost.

Lastly, kids and parents alike need time to relax and recharge. What is up with this country constantly pressuring everyone all the time? Everyone chill out for two minutes, please. Parents feel like they are doing their kids a disservice when they aren’t signed up for every activity. Oh no! Now Junior won’t get into an Ivy! There’s also social status. Good parents have their kid in a plethora of activities. Where I live, you would be SHUNNED if your kid only did one or two things.

I can already tell my daughter loves her music classes and gymnastics. I’m absolutely going to encourage her to continue those, but I refuse to push her to do more and more and more just so her days are completely filled and I feel like I’m keeping up with the other competitive parents.

There’s a tremendous amount of value in doing less. First, it’ll be easier on the wallet. Raising kids is extraordinarily expensive, pressure to fill their calendars only makes it more so. Family time needs to be restored and cherished. I don’t need to remind you how quickly childhood passes. Take some time to slow down and just be with your kids in an unstructured format. If your children say “I’m bored,” that’s fine! They’ll learn how to entertain themselves and it’ll encourage them to exercise that creativity muscle. The entire family will be less stressed, more balanced, and growing that ever-important bond.

If you find yourself with a packed calendar this school year, I encourage you to do a simple audit. Calculate the time and the money spent on each of the activities and let the kids prioritize them. Then schedule some downtime. I know this seems counterintuitive, but scheduling time to be unscheduled is a great hack. Whether it’s a Sunday afternoon or a few family dinners, have everyone commit to some boring time together (except maybe don’t phrase it like this to your teens). Finally, you need to model balance and rest. I know everyone is rolling their eyes now, and trust me, I am too. I suck at this. Let’s all show our kids it’s okay to recharge and it’s not time wasted. Again, I see the eyes rolling and I know I’m being insufferable, but let’s just give it a whirl!?

When it comes time to sign the kids up for their next activity and you’re feeling that pressure - pause for a moment then audit, prioritize, and make unstructured family time cool again!

Until next time,

-Catie